for all the moms out there

You know all of those things your mom said or did as you were growing up and you swore, "I will never do that!"? I have been experiencing a whirlwind of emotions- shock, confusion, regret, denial- as I find myself doing some of those very things I swore I would never do. The other day Carter and I ran into the grocery store after school to grab a couple necessities before going home. I literally only needed two items, so I didn't get a basket and Carter just walked next to me. I hurried to dairy, grabbed the milk, then blew past all the other aisles until I got to bread. For some reason there was a little hesitation on what loaf to grab, giving Carter time to find something he wanted, even though I clearly explained we were running in and out and not to ask for anything. He said "Ooh Mommy, I really love these!"
"No, Carter." I said as I pulled my loaf off the shelf and began walking toward the check-out. "But Mommy, wait-" Carter began and I saw him pull some forbidden choice off the shelf and begin to run after me. And that's when it happened. I did something I thought I wouldn't, couldn't, ever do. No, not spank my child in public. Not put a random item on the wrong shelf. It was this noise. "Eh, eh, eh!" This unforgettable, shrill, almost eery sound that would so quickly come out of my mother's mouth when I was about to do something wrong and she caught me, like when she would see me out of the corner of her eye about to taunt my little brother in the backseat of her minivan. The noise would paralyze me, preventing me from acting out whatever juvenile crime I was even giving thought to committing. And when, out of the corner of my eye, I saw Carter take that item off the shelf and put that first foot out like he was going to run it to me, I spun around, and that noise came out of my mouth. I noticed it immediately, but I was going to pretend I didn't do it. I told Carter to put the goods back on the shelf and reminded him how we talked about not asking for anything right before we came in. I turned back around to continue to check-out and was startled by an older woman, just standing there smiling at me. I flashed a quick smile and thought I would continue on until she said, "It's just natural, isn't it, when you're a mom." It was a question said more like a statement, to which I responded, "What?" I knew exactly what she was talking about. I wished I didn't, but I did.

"That sound." she said. And she just kept smiling and pushed her basket past me.

And then there were those emotions. Shock, confusion, regret, denial, and then just laughter. I am such a mom.

Love, sickness, and a dang good burger :)

What an eventful week! I don't have pictures to post, but thought I'd give the fam a little update on the week's happenings. I took my test on Saturday and will find out the results in a couple of weeks, keep your fingers crossed! (Not that anything can change at this point, but I just feel like I need some good luck!) Sean spent Monday thru Wednesday at home sick, and Carter joined him Tuesday and Wednesday with high fever as well. They were the most miserable couple of boys I have ever seen. It's amazing to me- I had the exact same symptons the week prior, but noone heard a peep out of me. Wimps. While they were layed out at death's door, I was still student teaching at Perfect School. In my class this week, the attendance never got higher than 15- that's 5 kids less than normal. Someone was always sick. Yesterday my mentor teacher was even out, leaving me to host the 'Valentine Party.' If you know kids, any kid, and you've seen them on "party days" at school... it's insane. Just knowing that something out of the ordinary is going to happen later that day gives them this 'speed' almost to super-power them through the entire day. I was prepared for this and came into class with my game face on. A 3rd grade class came in to read to my little Kindergarteners, so I had little pairs of children spread all over the room , the noise was at a manageable level, everything felt good. Then the most precious, little student came up to me. "Mrs. SHtevenshon," he said with his precious, little speech impediment, "I feel like I'm going to frow-" And suddenly his cheeks were filled. I didn't know with what until he slowly opened his mouth and vomit fell out, right in front of my feet. I spun his body around and began to run him to the bathroom. He eventually made it there, but not before puking once more on the tile on the way. I learned the procedures for cleaning vomit in the classroom yesterday. Perfect School has a, surprise, wonderful cleaning team that I owe my breakfast staying in my stomach to. After that, the rest of the day went great- Valentine's Party and all.

In the midst of Sean's illness, he was able to pull out the books and study for his first test of the semester. He took it Wednesday night and felt good. He's at work right now and will be for the next few days, which is why he got me an early Valentine's day gift. I came home yesterday to beautiful flowers, and a gift that shows my husband really knows me. He got The Perfect Brownie. You know, the infomercial where you insert the divider tray into the pan for "a perfect brownie every time!"? If you know me, you know that's something I would SO want/need. And he got it for me, and I didn't even have to ask! What a man. I also told him last night that I was craving a really good burger. First I was thinking Outback, then I thought Red Robin... but dear husband came up with an even better idea so I didn't have to change out of my sweatpants (because we all know the looks you can get when you go to a restaraunt on Friday night in sweatpants when everyone else there is dressed up for date night- how dare I lessen their efforts of making that night special by walking in lookin' a hot mess!). He grilled some delicious patties with swiss and pepperjack cheeses, toasted the buns, and added bacon and guacamole as finishing touches. It was the California burger- but even better because I was eating it in sweatpants on my couch! Mmm, so good.

Anyways, that sums up the highlights of the week. Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend. Tell everyone you love that you love them! Happy Valentine's Day :)

My apologies...

Time does not fly only when you're having fun. I wish that were the case. It flies even FASTER when you're just too darn busy! I mentioned that I started student teaching, and I love it. But good Lord, I am beat when I come home. The years of sitting in a seat listening to a college professor while I wrote my grocery/to-do list spoiled me. Now I'm on my feet constantly, running to break-up little Kindergarten spats, bending down to tie shoes, or kneeling next to an 18 inch table to explain something- like I said, it's constant. But I love it. The kids are so much fun and the school is an absolutely incredible place to be at.

There are two tests I have to take in order to become a certified teacher in the state of Texas, and each costs $120, because the cost of tuition is not enough to completely break the bank (sorry, had to throw that in there). Well I just took the first test yesterday and I'll find out the results in 3 very long weeks. You cannot make any lower than an 80% to pass, and if you do, you retake (and re-pay) until you get a passing score. I take a practice-test for the second required test in a couple of weeks, then the real thing the following month. Almost done!

To have a little spending money, and feel like I make some sort of contribution to our family, I started cleaning my parent's office once a week. Yep, I'm the cleaning lady. I'm also tutoring a little boy, which is awesome. It's great teaching practice, and it makes me feel good to help and see kids learn. Oh, I got into a little car accident this past Friday. A lady ran into the back of me when I was sitting at a stop light. My car's ok, just needs a little bumper repairing. My neck and back, however, are killing me. I've never experienced whiplash like that. I guess all the other wrecks I've been in I saw coming, so I braced myself. With this one I was totally unprepared and my face almost hit the steering wheel. I'm pretty doped up on pain medicine but expect to be at 100% any day now!

Carter is still loving school and doing so well. He's reading everything. He even started to read the Bible the other day in church because was "bored," haha! Here's a video of my 5-year old at my parents house a couple of weekends ago. He was helping in the yard :)

Sean is loving his new work schedule. He's done great at doing things around the house while I'm at the school. He's even made some of his own crockpot creations for dinner! Impressive, huh? And he lets me leave a "honey do" list for him that he actually does accomplish! Sean has swept, mopped, hung pictures, cleaned the fishtank, and even added some of his own little odd jobs. Here's some under-cabinet lighting he installed a couple of weeks ago. I love it.

I hope my February blog (haha! No, I will try to get on again this month!) finds everyone well! Love, the Stevensons